The Voices of Reason: Bad Travel

The Voices of Reason: Bad Travel
by Various Authors

In honor of the end of summer, and along with it the end of the travel season, this week the Voices of Reason look back on vacations. They do not look back fondly, though...

Question: What is the worst place you've travelled to?

Vance Macdonald—While in the Navy, I spent a month off the coast of Kamchatka in the dead of winter. As if that wasn't bad enough by itself, we were on a clandestine assignment, which meant radio silence, no mail, no contact with the outside world. Dreary, gray, bitterly cold. Just miserable. Actually, now that I think about it, I would repeat that experience before returning to Allentown, PA.

Bob Jensen—It was 9 a.m. before we finally found a room where we could get a few hours of much needed sleep. We had been driving through the night, from a Friday night game in Cincinnati, trying to make it in time to see a Saturday matinee. It struck me as odd that the national motel chain we stopped at seemed accustomed to renting rooms by the hour. We slept on top of the covers, though in retrospect that might have been the poorer choice.

This was my brother, his wife, and me. I had been there before, as had my brother. And while Philly claims to be the city of brotherly love, neither my brother or I have found a bit of love in this city. The Saturday game wound up being rained out, so we set about to see the city. We couldn't find a place to park within a mile of the Liberty Bell, and everyone that we asked for directions managed to point in a completely different direction than all of the people we had asked previously. Hell, we couldn't even find a decent cheesesteak.

Luckily, for us, the rainout was interleague play and we managed to make
the game up, since the game was part of a double header the next day. We went to New York in the morning and ended up with our own special Shea Stadium/Veterans Stadium double header that is a story in its own right. But returning to Philly does not give the story a happy ending. We managed to make it to the end of a very long double header, and we thought some of the vinegar would have gone out of the fans by that time. But we were wrong. The few fans that were left were some of the rudest that I have ever seen, and I have been in the Yankee Stadium bleachers.

The replacement of Philadelphia's Veterans Stadium last year makes me a little sad. Sad that I will have to return, that is. I will probably stay somewhere else and drive in for the game.

Mike Daniels—This one is a toss up, but it would have to be between Hays, Kansas and Kearney, Nebraska. I'll go with Hays for now. First, the trip there is more boring than the drive from Barstow to Laughlin. Once you leave East Denver, there is nothing but flatlands on the drive east to Hays. No mountains, no water, no scenery, nothing. Oh, there is an occasional silo around. Most of Kansas is like this, but at least east Kansas has some changes in elevation on the road. Not on this drive.

Once in Hays, try to find something to do. Sure, you have Fort Hays State University and all of the athletic events, but that's it. The five star hotel is
a Best Western. And if you want to eat, you can try to the midwest
staple Village Square or the mom and pop barbecue joint off the main
drag. It will never be listed on the "Top Ten Places To Visit In The
State of Kansas."

Martell—The worst place I've ever travelled to is El Paso, TX. I spent three long months there in the summer of 1995, working 12 hours a day, six days a week...and that was the good part of the trip. When I wasn't at work, I was either holed up in my 15' x 20' "efficiency" trying to escape the 100°+ heat or driving around the city looking at dirt. And there was dirt everywhere, even on the freeway. Whenever the wind blew, there were large dustclouds floating over the 10, blinding the drivers, as well as rows of tumbleweeds to dodge. It was just like the Wild West, but without the nostalgic charm.

Mark May—I really enjoy travel. I have been to many lovely and memorable places across 49 states, Canada, Mexico, several European countries and Japan. I take pleasure not only in the destination but also the path to get there. Planes, trains, cars, buses, bikes, foot—as long as I am moving and the views are enjoyable, I am happy.

That being said, I can think of several candidates for Least Liked Place. Stockton, CA and Garfield, NJ receive due consideration. I worked in both places for 12 weeks and 6 weeks, respectively. Stockton was particularly memorably bad. It smelled of foul, spoiled wine. The streets were not entirely safe. I still remember the night when the burglar was arrested on the ledge outside my window as he came out of the room above me.

I was pretty miserable as well in Stratford, England. It was overly commercial and joyless. It had all the charm of your local McDonalds. I nominate as well the entire Italian train system as a crappy place to visit. One of my worst evenings ever was spent sleeping in a hallway of a hot, stuffy, slow overnight train from Ventimiglia to Florence after being driven out of our compartment by a set of Italian grandparents who demanded more space for their precious grandchild.

However, there is one destination that stands out to me as representing in one place a lot of lousy characteristics, and gets my vote as Least Liked Place—Las Vegas. Hot, phony, over-hyped, over-amped, loud, smoky, crowded—and that just describes the drive along I-15 or arriving at McCarron Airport! It gets worse once one makes it to the Strip. Free watered-down drinks and cheap food are not enough of a consolation. I usually suffer from at least one case of the buffet blues when I am there. I imagine that I might feel differently if I was a VIP at the Mirage or the Wynn, but I usually end up at Circus Circus, the Imperial Palace, etc. If I never visit Las Vegas again, my life will not be poorer.

To submit a topic for The Voices of Reason, or to be added to the VoR Shout Out List, send an e-mail to martell@babblog.com.