Ramblings

Ramblings
by Steve Finkelstein

I’M BA-AAACK! After a self-imposed hiatus due to creative constipation, I return to to enlighten and entertain. First off, my detailed opinion and analysis of the Presidential election: ARRRRRGGGGGGGGHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

After that lengthy discourse, there’s not much left to say, except that I’m kinda surprised that this country is de-evolving into a theocracy. Didn’t the founding fathers have something to say about the separation of church and state? I would expound on this further, but I’m outta Maalox at the moment. Suffice to say, if you readers want more on this subject, rent the 1960 movie Inherit the Wind. ‘Nuff said.

As a long time Angeleno, I am truly appalled at the driving conditions that exist in L.A. This situation has been going on for some time now. I remember in 1992, I got onto the Harbor freeway and, in making a lane change, accidentally cut off a driver. Somehow, I had a hunch this fellow might be a bit peeved when he made a lane change to my left and pulled up alongside me, wearing a Cheshire cat grin, and limply held a sawed-off shotgun against the cab of his pickup truck (true story). That I’m here today shows that luckily this fellow didn’t want to engage in target practice. As for the consequences of that particular day, it was a good thing I was wearing my Depends...

In a more recent experience, I was exiting the parking lot of a shopping center as a fellow in a car with Georgia license plates was entering the parking lot, coming in my direction, at a speed that I felt was too rapid. I merely expressed my displeasure by a smirk; no more, no less. As I was about to leave, this fellow backed out toward the exit, rolled down his window, and started to mouth what looked like a torrent of angry obscenities. (Having my window rolled up, I couldn’t make out the fellow’s jeremiad.) This prompted me to roll down my window & issue this pithy retort: “I HAVE TWO WORDS FOR YOU--ANGER MANAGEMENT.” Upon leaving the place, I thought this was the end of it, but NOOOOOO! This individual followed me out of the parking lot, angrily blaring his horn at me. Quick thinking on my part (and a strategic U-turn) prevented me from becoming “roadkill.” I’m sure many Angelenos have had similar experiences to mine. To add to these indignites, the city’s streets and freeways have become more clogged than Bill Clinton’s arteries before the operation. More rapid transit would be the practical solution, but that’s about as likely as the E.R.A. passing under the current Presidential administration.

I will now continue my manic musings on movies that I’ve recently seen. In the past several weeks I’ve caught three excellent films; the following is a guide to the star rating system that many critics use in evaluating movies:

--poor
--fair
--good
--excellent

Team America: World Police--If you’re a fan of gut-busting, politically incorrect humor, have I got the film for you! South Park’s Trey Parker and Matt Stone have made a puppet film that mercilessly skewers the left and right, depicting a jingoistic U.S. anti-terrorist team team who go after both middle-Eastern terrorists and everyone’s favorite North Korean dictator, Kim Jong Il. The film also works as an unrelenting satire on brainless blockbuster action films. Hysterical! I laughed my ass off!

Sideways--Director Alexander Payne (Election, About Schmidt) has made another excellent film in this comedy-drama depicting a fateful 7-day trip with a depressive 8th grade English teacher (Paul Giamatti) and his about-to-be-married, philandering friend. As they make their way through the wine country near Santa Barbara, they encounter a pair of women which leads to some romantic and traumatic complications. Terrific! Payne has made another fine film that is both perceptive and true to life, and after American Splendor, Giamatti gives another great performance, proving that he’s one of the best film actors on the scene today. The film is a trifle overlong, but that’s a minor quibble. The best film I’ve seen so far this year.

Vera Drake--Independent film director Mike Leigh (Secrets & Lies) comes up with another winner, a heart-wrenching story that tells of the plight of a woman perfoming illegal abortions in 1950 Britain. An excellent cautionary tale that showed the harsh penalties involved in the days when Britain and other countries adopted draconian measures to prevent abortions. A fine allegorical warning that shows what could happen if Roe V. Wade were overturned in the U.S. (a distinct possibility).

Well, that about wraps it up for now. Because of my long hiatus, have adopted a modified closing line:

See you sooner.

Steve can be reached at steve@babblog.com.