Nightmares, Part 2

Nightmares, Part 2
by Oliver Butterick

I had another nightmare the other night. This time, it had something to do with a grizzly bear. I think I was chased or attacked by the bear, but the dream dissipated before I wrote about it, so I’m not quite sure.

More importantly, though, I’d like to follow up on my previous nightmare article, as I’ve received quite a bit of fan response to it. Thank you to everyone who has been reading my articles, and keep the feedback coming.

Almost immediately after the article was uploaded onto the internet, I received two e-mails from my dad. Both e-mails were articles that he found on the internet related to nightmares. The first article indicates that 5-8% of adults have recurrent nightmares, and that it indicates a “thin-boundary” personality/creative personality and may have associated psychopathology. Now tell me something I didn’t know! I guess I’ll have to leave the psychopathology stuff to the professionals, but I’ve always considered myself to be a somewhat creative person. However, I’ve never heard of “thin-boundary” personalities, so I decided to delve into the internet to see what I could find.

According to Intuitive Connections, unlike “thick-boundary” people, who tend to fixate on definitive goals and anchor themselves in the sensory world, “thin-boundary” people act with apparent detachment, characteristic of artists, writer and musicians. THIN-BOUNDARY TYPES ALSO TESTED SIGNIFICANTLY HIGHER FOR CLAIRVOYANCE. And I thought I was kidding about having mind-reading abilities.

This article also declares “recurrent nightmares are the most defining symptom of post-traumatic stress disorder.” If you ask any of my ex-girlfriends, I’m sure that they will tell you that I’m “damaged goods” and that I am very likely to have suffered some sort of trauma to make me that way. Looking back, I can think of only two events that might count: The Challenger Explosion in ’86 and 9/11. I clearly remember where I was when both of these events happened--they’re two of the moments that my generation will remember the same way that people of my parents’ generation remember the day that JFK was shot.

I know that many people feel that they were traumatized by the Kennedy assassination, but neither of these other two events could have possibly had the same effect on me. It’s not that I didn’t care about the people that died during these events; it’s just that they did not affect me on a personal level. (Well, due to increased security, I did have to wait an hour to get into the Long Beach courthouse earlier this year, but that’s another story.) So, I was not traumatized by either of these events. Hmm...I guess there’s a third incident that I remember just as clearly--the day my parents got divorced when I was five years old. I think that might help explain why my ex-girlfriends might call me damaged goods, but it doesn’t do anything to explain my nightmares.

The second article my dad sent me offered advice on dealing with chasing dreams. Instead of asking your chaser why they are chasing you, this article suggests a more confrontational approach. The dream story in the article has the dreamer confronting the chaser by yelling, “You can’t hurt me!” Then, as if out of a movie (which dreams sometimes resemble), the chaser tells the dreamer that he wasn’t trying to hurt her--instead he was chasing her to tell her that he loved her. So, maybe my nightmares aren’t from trauma, but are still affected by my parents’ divorce. Maybe my nightmares are trying to help me stop sabotaging all of my relationships.

The second response to my article came from one of my aforementioned “sabotaged relationships.” One of my ex-girlfriends wrote me to tell me that she thought my article was hilarious. Not because she (still?) enjoys my misfortune, but because my nightmare was remarkably similar to her own. She commented on how her dreams (and probably everyone’s) take random inexplicable twists that seem somehow to make sense or are otherwise accepted as normal. More interestingly, though, she told me that she has had chasing dreams for as long as she can remember, and a few years ago, she experienced the same shift that I have--she now is the one doing the chasing. This is both bizarre and comforting, for the same reason--someone else has experienced the same pattern in her nightmares that I have.

The third response was neither bizarre nor comforting, but somewhat upsetting. It came from my sister, about two weeks after my article was published. She called to tell me that she had her first chase dream last night. And she blamed it all on me. Little sister still blaming me for everything; and I thought that we were all grown up. Not only does she blame me for her nightmare because it came after she read my article, but in her dream, she was being chased by ME! Apparently, I was trying to kill her, and when she ran to the police department, they made her call our mother. 26 years old and still crying to mom when I try to kill you. Sheesh! Anyway, she did have the compassion to tell the police not to kill me when I found her at the station, which is more mercy than I was shown during our childhood. I guess she no longer relishes in my misfortune either.

Oliver can be reached at oliver@babblog.com.